boys willl be boys

Sometimes I look at my boys and think how proud I am too have such smart little boys. My life literally revolves around these two. Adiah Jaylen Franco, Dredyn Micah Franco. My day consitis of Fighting,spiderman,laughing,crying,words that maake no sense, back talk, scooter riding, dirt everywhere, food everywhere, and alot more. Most of the time I want to pull my hair out. Being stuck in a house with a 2 and 3 year old is not what I though my life would be when I was growing up.I am 20 years old. But I wouldn't change it for the world. I got pregent young, thought I was in love but little did I know what life had in store for me.And honestly, They push me to be someone I never thought I'd be, they showed me what true love is. How pure it is. I wouldn't take it back even if I could. Raising little boys scares me. I'm so stressed all the time about how the boys will look at me when they are older. It scares me that they will resent me from keeping them from alot of their family. for not trying harder to be with there dad. or even trying to get along with him. It also scares me that they look up too him. He is not a good person. I wouldn't want my boys to ever be like him. And I ouldn't want them to be like me. I want them to be better. I want them to succeed and live their life with no worries. be a kid for as long as they can. be a teenager. go to college. have fun. make the most out of life cause it's not their fault. I do feel anger at myself for bringing them in a world that even I wasn't ready for.They deserve it all. Although I can't give them everything..I will try my best to guide them in the right direction and shw them love and how important it is to be you and to think before you make any kind of serious decisions. I can only hope this will be enough.

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Comments (2)

  1. jascieepinn

    Your childrens’ father is a good person. Like you said, hate the act and not the performer, the sin and not the sinner, the crime and not the criminal. I have a friend who is so backwards with her son that, now that she’s remarried, she’s made her son believe that his step-father is his birth father and that his actual father is his step-father. It’s really twisted. The boy calls his real dad by his first name. I don’t have kids with my ex-husband but if I did, I’d never let my feelings toward him affect my kids. Just a thought. Anyway, I find your love and dedication to your children absolutely admirable and I’m totally looking forward to those spiderman, horse-playing years with my little Austin. Keep doing everything you can for them. In the future, they’ll appreciate it SO much.

    July 05, 2014
    1. amandaadanielle

      honestly, my kids are my world. I’d do anything for them.i couldn’t ever find it in my heart to lie to them. specially something as big as knowing who their father really is. When they are older and really understand what is going on and figure out the truth then the mom is going to look bad for making them believe this person was their father.They are goin to hold resentment towards mom. I would not be able to live knowing my boys could possibly resent me. They respect you way more when u r honest with them. And It is so worth all the trouble having a baby..watching them grow is worth all the pain of labor.. alll u feel is joy and just proud of them. That they are yours and a part of you that you know you actually did right.

      July 05, 2014