Being a mother is hard. Being a Step Mother is even more hard. Being a Stay at home mother/ step mother is probably the toughest thing ever. Knowing that people are rooting for you to fail so they can sweep in and take your kids is irritating and always on the back of my mind. But you can call me a hoe, bitch whatever you want..BUT i refuse to let ANYBODY call me a bad mom.I put my all into my children..maybe i slacked off when I was younger but I didn't know any better and I didn't know how to be a parent. After all being a mother doesn't come with insstructions. I'm not a perfect mother at all. I cuss, yell,spank,want to give up, forget to think of the kids feelings sometimes,I don't clean up after them 24/7 or constantly play with them every second of the day. But what my kids know and what I know..I love them. I love them with every part of me. I love them more then words can even describe. Everything I do is for them. My kids are wild, they get into everything they fall,scrape their knees, they have gotten into the cleaning supplies once right away I called the EMT.(turned out baby dre hadn't ingested the cleaning supplies like I thought) I cried for hours thinking how he could of gotten sick or even died.They have burned there selves on my curling iron..(this was my fault,i shoul of known to not leave it aroundd Adiah..he actually burned himself because he was reaching over to help his brother get his toothbrush and his belly touched the iron.) I've gotten angry at the boys. To wich led to me crying my eyes out. The last thing I want to be is like my mother.
I am not perfect..and I never will be..but I do learn from my mistakes. If i am a bad mother for not knowing, for not being perfect, for learning, and for trying my hardest well..Im sorry. But as long as my boys know I love them at the end of the day that is all that matters.